08:23 < fagbot> YouTube: YouTube – Rock Me Tonite – Billy Squier (HQ Audio)
08:23 < solios> < nicole> When I think I’m a failure in life, I just watch this video and think: At least I didn’t make this video.
08:25 < xeno> fagbot: doot solios linking a youtube video
08:25 < fagbot> …and that, children, is how to clean and load a .38 revolver. Questions?
08:25 < xeno> solios: we’re all obligated to ignore it, you know that right?
08:31 < mdxi> if you dissect it a bit, that one was probably pretty successful. it’s very stylish (for the period). it’s a bit abstract, which was trendy. it’s just one set, dressed two ways, with one tracking camera, one crane camera, and possibly one handheld, so costs were low.
08:31 < solios> :D
08:31 < xeno> and almost said something, but then remembered i already knew that
08:31 < solios> awesome.
08:31 < xeno> fagbot: doot mdxi
08:31 < fagbot> you can see how upset it makes me
08:31 < xeno> indeed
08:31 < mdxi> it’s mostly just billy squier, which is also cheap, and makes all the girlies who liked billy squier happy
08:32 < mdxi> and THEN
08:32 < solios> mdxi++
08:32 < xeno> It’s times like this I realize how lucky I actually was growing up with only classical music (or my parents’ shitty country or christian radio stations)
08:32 < mdxi> if you want, you can look at it as a storyline. he’s singing about having sex with someone, but no one is there. and there’s these freeze-frames during musical climaxes, one with a hip thrust and one with a shirt ripping
08:33 < xeno> Because I missed almost all of the crap.
08:33 < mdxi> i think this video is about billly squier spending a night furiously masturbating alone
08:33 < mdxi> it’s an autobiographical piece
Quick and dirty test of Jetpack’s Post by Email. The timing on this is fantastic – I was going to test with a crappy phone photo of The Core (lulz) but my phone camera seems to have finally kicked it.
Turns out the camera still works, it just can’t handle THE CORE. LoC shouldn’t have to either, so I’ll stick with the gloom.
Sent from my crappy iPhone 3gs!
(And touched up a bit after upload.)
Two weeks later…
Dumped the database and rsync’ed up to the server on Monday. Poked at things here and there on Tuesday and Wednesday, doing a bit towards taking the leap on migration. Finally went Full Retard this afternoon. Long story short .dev is now .org and after beating character set issues out of the database, injecting analytics into six friggin’ blogs, Jetpacking three, ripping a leftover 2011 mobile stylesheet out of the DCRSA, finding a bug in Noise and unbreaking it but not fixing it (the Related segment of single.php was barfing on tags, now it’s just dry heaving)… after One Hour Photo (creepy) and Cloud Atlas (boring) and during the climax of Pretty in Pink (great sountrack)… and with Man Behind the Curtaining and permissions unfuckery from Eric… LoC and the rest of the Cut Necktie Mausoleum are GO! WITHOUT MOBILE STYLESHEETS.
10:34 < ejp>
10:35 < solios> bahahaha
10:35 < ejp> it’s funnier than it should be
10:36 < xeno> goddamn that still pisses me off, all these years later
10:36 < xeno> “i’ll never let go jack!” *lets go* “I’ll never let go…”
10:37 < ejp> I haven’t seen it.
10:37 < xeno> You’d probably hate it.
10:37 < xeno> I really liked it.
10:37 < solios> what titanic?
10:37 < ejp> there’s nothing about it that even makes me think it won’t be shit.
10:37 < solios> it hasn’t aged particularly well
10:38 < solios> ejp: you’re missing nothing
10:38 < solios> unless you’re really into boat porn
10:38 < ejp> I am not.
10:38 < solios> in which case it’s like the boat porn deep throat
10:38 < xeno> fagbot: doot #loc
10:38 < fagbot> SO ANYWAY I LIKE DICK AND THAT’S THAT. I THINK THAT’S ALL YOU NEED TO KNOW ABOUT ME
10:38 < ejp> that…that made no goddamn sense solios
10:38 < xeno> fagbot: botsnack
10:38 * fagbot wiggles
10:38 < xeno> ejp: *solios*
10:38 < ejp> xeno: it made no sense even graded on a curve
10:39 < solios> ejp: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Deep_Throat_(film)
10:39 < ejp> yes I know what it is.
10:39 < xeno> solios:metaphor::chicken:nautical miles
10:39 < ejp> lkasdjf
10:39 < ejp> xeno++
10:39 < solios> xeno++
2013.10.09, 08:44 – After years of dicking around as an also-ran, inheriting designs from mercury.mirrorshades.org and deadcityradio.org, loc.dcr finally gets to go first. During Q4 of 2013 and possibly Q1 of 2014 I’m transitioning a total of six Movable Type websites and one static website to WordPress. Having the lowest information requirements (can use any wordpress theme) and the smallest number of potential quirks (exactly one, it’s the only multi-author site in the network), it made sense to start work here. And by “here” I mean some what literally here, at my desk. loc.dcr is the first website I’ve built using MAMP, and given the needs of the deadcityradio.org and amongthechosen.com migrations, it’ll probably be the onlyest – after I’ve finished the mobile stylesheet I’ll be taking a look at what the real migration to the live server is going to look like by moving this site from a MAMP install on my 2007 mac mini to a pending ServerPress install on a 2009 Shuttle box… or a 2001 G4 Digital Audio if DesktopServer doesn’t care for xp64.
11:59 < mdxi> a friend, who is an awesome person, but is a little older and not as attached to the internet, on twitter: “I just watched Miley Cyrus at VMA for 1 minute and i just looked up twerking and I’m very sorry I did both those things.”
12:02 < ejp> mdxi: you should explain shwerking
12:02 < ejp> show him the TRUE horror of a) his friends b) the internet
12:03 < solios> ^
12:03 < ejp> and worse of all, internet friends.
12:08 < solios> thing is if it wasn’t for her, the VMA never would have punctured my infosphere
12:08 < mdxi> “it’s like twerking, but the person doing it has a sharkbutt. that’s a butt, which grows sharkteeth. and eats dicks. really, ‘must eat dicks’, in a like manner as rodents who must gnaw on branches and whatnot. while twerking, yes. it all follows in a perfectly logical manner.”
12:09 < solios> (he said in a bored monotone, over behind-the-scenes footage of the club scene)
12:17 < ejp> with a slight RP accent
12:20 < mdxi> “This is a good place,” he said.
12:20 < mdxi> “There’s a lot of liquor,” I agreed.”
12:20 < mdxi> – Ernest Hemingway, The Sun Also Rises
12:21 < solios> mdxi: we’d do the closeup tooth porn shots the same way they do werewolf TF porn in horror movies. Shoot the shark teeth being pulled into the ass then reverse the footage.
12:22 < solios> oddly I know everyone we’d need to do it.
12:26 < ejp> not that oddly.
12:30 < solios> well, I *did* go to an IDT school.
12:31 < xeno> fagbot: IDT?
12:31 < fagbot> bugger all, i dunno, xeno
12:31 < xeno> fagbot: IDT is Imagining Dicks and Tits
12:31 < fagbot> OK, xeno
12:33 < mdxi> huh. i think i went to one of those as well…
12:33 < mdxi> it was called “high school”
12:38 < solios> fagbot: IDT is also Industrial Design Technology (aka practical movie effects and automotive design)
12:38 < fagbot> OK, solios
12:45 < ejp> and just think, now we can 3d print dongs
12:45 < solios> and shark teeth
12:45 < solios> the butt would have to be cast/silicon though
12:50 < ejp> you know there’s a tertiary market for sharkbutt sextoys right?
12:50 < solios> that’s the entire marketing push
12:50 < ejp> he he he, push.
12:50 < solios> instead of action figures
12:51 < ejp> who’s working on the kickstarter page for this?
12:51 < solios> sharkbutt sculpts for the boys, “pre-chewed” dongsculpts for the girls
12:51 < solios> hmm!
12:54 < solios> does the fin mount between the cheeks or out of the coccyx?
12:57 < ejp> whoa whoa whoa. nobody said anything about a fin dude
12:57 < ejp> that’s just weird
12:57 < solios> for the poster.
12:57 < solios> doesn’t have to be in the movie.
12:57 < ejp> oh. coccyx.
12:58 < ejp> and it guess it works good as a handle for the toy.
12:59 < solios> crap, we’re going to end up with a functional design for this thing
The new #loc movie franchise: SHARKBUTT!
09:01 < ejp> http://ramblingsofadeadite.tumblr.com/post/51282015822/quick-reminder-that-these-are-all-real-movies
09:11 < mdxi> i vote “Sand Sharks” for worst photoshop
09:11 < mdxi> it may be a real movie, but that is a terrible job on the box art
09:12 < solios> ._.
09:14 < mdxi> also, the incredible prevalence of shark + butt makes me wish there was a movie called Buttshark or something
09:14 < mdxi> maybe Sharkbutt, which would be more of a body horror thing
09:14 < ejp> Buttshark or Sharkbutt?
09:14 < ejp> Sharkbutt, She’ll Devour You Whole!
09:15 < mdxi> i was thinking that sharkbutt should be a male hooker, actually
09:15 < ejp> hrm
09:15 < mdxi> who has 100% MEDICALLY ACCURATE shark jaw implants in his butt, which will cause teeth to constantly grow in and will kill him, UNLESS HE BITES THE COCKS OFF OF UNSUSPECTING JOHNS… WITH HIS SHARKBUTT
09:16 < mdxi> i’m a goddamned cinematic genius
09:16 < ejp> not 100% sure “genius” is the correct word
09:18 < solios> mdxi: it’s a fresh spin on twerking
09:18 < mdxi> SHWERKING
09:19 < solios> mdxi++
09:19 < solios> mdxi: HOW SOON CAN YOU START FILMING
09:20 < ejp> he already is, you’re handling the CG.
09:21 < ejp> you’re good at putting sharkteeth in assholes right?
09:21 * solios fires up after effects
09:22 < solios> ejp: I’ll rubber-stamp from Jaws 3d. Nobody will notice!
09:22 < mdxi> butthola dentata
09:23 < solios> IN THREE DEE
09:24 < ejp> maybe it wants to be an awkward love story between our guy and a hooker and with a heart of gold, and a vagina full of teeth?
09:25 < ejp> driven by their need to bite dicks off, his is the only dick she won’t bite off and she doesn’t have one.
09:25 < ejp> solios: crap, I think I just reinvented Wizards First Rule.
09:25 < solios> if it was an ass full of teeth then we could do ASS TO ASS. Which means she’d have to be played by Jennifer Connelly.
09:25 < ejp> hrm. I’m ok with this.
09:26 < ejp> sharkbutt is totally matthew mcconaughey.
09:27 < solios> only if his pimp is that illuminati guy from Texas Chainsaw Massacre: The Next Generation
09:27 < ejp> I happily have NFI what you’re talking about, but sure
09:29 < solios> it’s superbad
09:29 < solios> not BUTTSHARK bad, but close
09:29 * solios wonders if john williams will be available to score
09:29 < ejp> sharkbutt. buttshark is about a share with an ass for a head
09:29 < ejp> *shark
09:29 < mdxi> if you want to be terrorized by McConaughey, you need to watch Reign of Fire
09:30 < mdxi> it’s almost nothing but shirtless, bald, scenery-chewing McConaughey
09:30 < mdxi> and also some CG dragons
09:30 < solios> mdxi: I have. And you’re right.
09:30 < ejp> at least he wasn’t trying to be funny.
09:30 < mdxi> is that why he was so funny?
09:30 < solios> yes
09:30 < ejp> I actually disliked him least in reign of fire
09:31 < solios> well, you’ll love him in SHARKBUTT
09:32 < solios> as he shwerks his way across los angeles
09:33 < mdxi> i am lolling at my desk
09:34 < mdxi> i’m sold on mcconaughey as the male lead. i’m thinking Glozell for the love interest.
09:34 < ejp> oh, can the squel be SHARKBUTT 2 : A SHWERK TOO FAR
09:35 < ejp> that’s the best part of these movies. you can kill EVERYONE at the end, and still have a sequel!
09:35 < solios> ejp: oh, BUTTSHARK is the knock-off The Asylum will release the week before (or after) in an attempt to capitalize on the success (or failure) of SHARKBUTT
09:36 < solios> ejp: opening scene of Sharkbutt 2 : mcconaughey being cloned from a sharkbutt tooth found in the wreckage of the first movie
09:37 < solios> only if we can’t get him for the sequel the cloning process goes horribly wrong (pan across a room full of alien 4 style tanks of horribly deformed sharkbutts)
09:37 < solios> great, now it’s The Fly 2
09:40 < solios> actually, wait. That’s good. We can just find/replace “fly” with “sharkbutt”. SCRIPT COMPLETE.
09:40 < mdxi> part 3 should be a Sharkbutt/Cube xover. because of the 3 (get it?) and because mashing two movies together doesn’t take any talent at all, just like the whole …With Zombies thing
09:41 < solios> Starring Ice Cube as sharkbutt’s new pimp
09:41 < mdxi> hey hey HEY! this is ART we will not talk about the LEPRECHAUN series here!
09:41 < solios> okay, okay. We’ll get MC Hammer.
09:42 < solios> or Vanilla Ice. He’s cheap.
09:43 < solios> mdxi: is it the third or fourth film that’s In Space?
09:43 < mdxi> fifth, i think, actually
09:43 < mdxi> pretty sure Leprechaun In The Hood is #4
09:43 < fagbot> YouTube: YouTube – Ice T Smokes Out a Leprechaun
09:43 < solios> crap that means we’ll need a plot for the fourth.
09:44 < solios> SHARKBUTT 4: JUDGEMENT NIGHT
09:44 < mdxi> SHARKBUTT 6: ANY GIVEN SUNDAY (people love sports movies)
09:45 < solios> in which an entire CFL team is shwerked
09:46 < solios> SHARKBUTT 5: RE-ENTRY (in which sharkbutt shwerks his way onto the ISS to something something the villian from one of the earlier films)
09:51 < ejp> I leave for a few minutes and you two go totally off the rails
09:52 < mdxi> SHARKBUTT 7: OFF THE RAILS
07:28 < solios> it’s been my experience that random number generators sickeningly stick to a narrow range of numbers (for example “in the 30s” of 1-100)
07:28 < solios> oh, that
07:28 < xeno> fagbot: roll 1d100
07:28 < fagbot> xeno rolls 76, needs 60, xeno LIVES
07:28 < xeno> O_O
07:28 < solios> fagbot: roll 1d100
07:28 < fagbot> solios rolls 43, needs 39, solios LIVES
07:28 < solios> >.>
07:28 < xeno> \m/
07:28 < solios> fagbot: roll 1d100 for xenolios
07:28 < solios> pween
07:28 < xeno> nice job breaking it, hero
07:28 < solios> fagbot: roll 1d100
07:28 < fagbot> solios rolls 30, needs 36, solios DIES
07:29 < solios> see? half of those six numbers are in the 30s.
07:29 < solios> PROVING MY POIINT.
07:29 < xeno> :D
17:36 < xeno> remember when we came to this server and were all mildly horrified at the lack of chanserv and nickserv?
17:37 < xeno> And like a day later didn’t even remember we gave a ghost of a shit
17:37 < solios> and how we didn’t abuse it or even care until tuesday?
17:37 < solios> fucking tuesdays, man.
17:37 < xeno> They’re like the Thursdays of the Week World.
17:38 < xeno> fagbot: thursday?
17:38 < fagbot> rumour has it thursday is when the Vogons are due
17:38 < xeno> see?
17:38 < fagbot> FUCK YEAH
17:38 < solios> fagbot: tuesday?
17:38 < fagbot> tuesday is the face of evil.
17:38 < solios> see?
17:38 * fagbot poops.
17:38 < solios> skjldddddf
17:38 < xeno> :D
11:40 < solios> maybe it just builds up in your third spleen
11:41 < xeno> nah, i got rid of that.
11:41 < xeno> Ooh, and i also wrecked my lungs!
11:42 < xeno> xeno_jr still has balloons from when he was in the hospital, and they *still* are floating.
11:42 < xeno> So I bit a hole in one and sucked down the helium, and apparently aspirated some oil or something
11:42 < xeno> Dry congestion, sore throat, and sparkly vision.
11:42 < solios> O_o
11:43 < solios> maybe you have a helium allergy
11:43 < solios> or they were filled with VX
11:43 < xeno> :o
11:44 < xeno> Or heliox.
11:46 < solios> more likely
11:47 < xeno> It’s used to treat COPD and upper respiratory ailments.
11:47 < xeno> Considering how I react to other medicines and treatments, it would not surprise me at all if it instead *caused* them for me.
11:49 < solios> well, you *are* polarized
11:50 < solios> wouldn’t surprise me if helium just went to the bottom of your lungs and stayed there
11:50 * ejp reverses xeno’s polarity
11:50 -!- xeno is now known as solios_
11:50 -!- solios is now known as xeno_
11:50 < solios_> GODDAMMIT SWITCH IT BACK
11:50 < xeno_> ejp: NOW LOOK WHAT YOU DID